Project updates
- Math relearning – I’ve finished preschool and posted my comments on the wiki (modules 2, 3, 4, and 5). I’m still working out the best way to produce content from this material that’s useful to me without slowing myself down too much. But I’m considering this a stopping point, and I’m going to take a brief break for other projects (see “Project scheduling” below).
- Diet – I spoke too soon, since apparently your triglycerides (and maybe other lipids?) can get worse at first on a low-carb diet as the fat gets flushed from your cells, so my doctor wants me to try it another two months and have another blood test, and I agreed, even though I’m still skeptical that a LCHF diet is right for everyone. He also recommended staying away from gluten in case a sensitivity to it was causing my ulcerative colitis (which I’ll ask my gastroenterologist about) and making all my own food so I’ll know exactly what’s in it. Even though I agreed to extend the diet, I still got very depressed that day feeling imprisoned by it and the doctor’s other suggestions, especially in cases where I’d be socializing around food I couldn’t eat, but it only took me a day or two to mostly get over it, though I still get frustrated whenever I read anything about nutrition or dieting because of the confusion around nutrition science and the inconvenience and severity of some of the advice, which makes me think eating (and life?) isn’t about enjoyment anyway, which is depressing, so I guess I’m really not over it. Anyway, I’m going to try planning out my meals for the next two months, because I really dislike always wondering what I’m going to eat next.
- Daily routine – Still a mush, but fatigue is one of my greatest enemies, and my routine is largely about getting enough sleep, so I’m going to keep trying, and I wonder what would happen if I made getting to bed on time a project so I planned each evening around it, instead of planning the evening around getting certain things done, which probably means asking myself several times each evening what plans for that day I need to sacrifice. Sunday morning my pastor pointed out that self-indulgence dulls our spiritual perception, and self-denial sharpens it so that we see more clearly what God loves and hates, which sounds like a good aid to motivation for things like devotions and even sleep, since sleep often feels like a necessary evil, a sacrifice for the sake of productivity, patience, cheerfulness, and other good qualities (assuming cheerfulness is better than mild depression).
- Project scheduling – I have a bunch of other projects that have been waiting for a stopping point in my math relearning, but I don’t want to take too long of a break from math, so I’m going to try alternating weeks again, which should work better now that I have these blog updates to encourage more of a structure to my time. I’m hoping a weekly rotation will help me learn to match my work on each project to the time available, since I want to have something to post by the end of each week. I’ve done some prioritizing on my current project ideas, and this week I’ll try for writing my time management thoughts, planning my meals for the next few weeks, catching up on my invoicing for freelance work, and maybe reading some in the books people have loaned me–you know, the kinds of responsible things that life is about.
- TV – I watched the “Children of Earth” story arc from Torchwood last week, and while I’m sure someone with a more refined literary sense could critique its storytelling, I thought it was an amazing piece of television in terms of raising and discussing the issues involved in its premise, some of which I care about a lot. In particular, decision making is one of the topics I want to focus on in my cognitive science studies, and the story explored decision making in truly dire situations.
- Video games – Saturday night I went over to Jeremy’s place to watch him set up the projector he’s borrowing for our Star Wars marathon and to help him and his son some more with Minecraft. I also showed them Bityard and my latest single-player project, which I’ll talk about more in future updates, if I decide to continue with it, since life is not about enjoyment but duty!
Life updates
- Health – My Humira for my ulcerative colitis hasn’t been working very well, so my doctor ordered a blood test to see if my body’s even using it, so I’m waiting for those results, and then we’ll talk about the next step.
- Socializing – Our head Immanuel Prayer trainer is relocating to Arkansas, so Saturday we had a going away party for her. Potlucks are always a little stressful for me to prepare for because I’m never completely sure what to bring, but thank goodness for prepackaged salads. I’ve been away from the ministry for a while, so I met some interesting new people, including a Kindergarten teacher who’s taking time off to write. Immanuel folks know how to have a meaningful get together, and we spent some time sharing what Jessie’s meant to us, and then she shared what we’ve meant to her, and we prayed for her and watched a tribute video and had a video call with a team member who was in Singapore, and the goodness of it all reminded me again of how important the central ideas of this ministry are, things like relational connection, gratitude, and a growing capacity for joy, though I might have to rethink that with my new philosophy of joylessness.
Well, obviously you don’t need sleep, so stop taking it. Obviously you don’t need any fun either, because history has shown that by omitting fun, you are more likely to end up sitting in a corner crying all day, which is… wait, that’s not what you should do.
Also, you are a robot.
Well if I were a human, I could enjoy life or be healthy and responsible, but not both.
I certainly know the feeling of food as a prison–even without a highly restrictive diet! Deciding what to cook is always the hardest part for me. Making menus ahead of time sounds like a great idea–that’s what those homemaker-mother-of-preschooler blogs suggest, anyway. Hope it works well for you!